How many people can say they’ve directly saved a life? Very few.
Rusty Rastello’s professional achievements are impressive. He formerly served as Executive Wine Director at SingleThread (Three Stars and Green Star), Assistant Wine Director at Eleven Madison Park (Three Stars), and Sommelier at Gramercy Tavern (One Star).
But what makes him even more special is the way he treats others. A man of strong moral compass, he frequently performs random acts of kindness to strangers, without wanting others to know and not expecting anything in return. If faced with the situation, he would run into a burning building in order to save any stranger’s life.
After seeing Lucali's Mark Iacono share a moving end-of-life story, Rusty felt compelled to offer the ultimate act of kindness to a stranger: donating a kidney.
Below, we spoke to Rastello about his journey.
What inspired you to save a stranger’s life?
Courage is an interesting thing because you think you have it until you don't. I had been thinking about that idea quite a bit, and then I saw Mark's post.
I want to be this person that would run into a burning building to save somebody, which, in reality, is pretty stupid. You don't even know if somebody's in there. You don't even know if you're going to be successful, and you likely are going to kill yourself while doing it. But then here's a thing, [kidney donation], where it has a really high success rate, both for myself and for the recipient. So why would I do this dangerous, stupid thing that's over the top and crazy, [burning building], but I wouldn't do this other thing, [kidney donation]?
How did the experience change you?
It made me a better person. I really try to be a good person, and I go out of my way to do that. It just became easier to continuously do the right thing in life. My heart knows.
I manage 200 employees. I care for all of them deeply. I would take a bullet for most, if not all, of them. I became more confident in what I'm doing, because if I've done this crazy thing that saves someone's life, I can make a decision that has to do with my union staff.
In your career, you’ve worked at a number of MICHELIN restaurants, including SingleThread, Eleven Madison Park, and Gramercy Tavern. What did you learn along the way?
A lot. I've been working in restaurants since I was 14 years old. At the root, it’s taking care of people. That’s why this was an easier thing for me because I show up to work every day to make people happy and take care of them and create experiences for them.
When I got to Eleven Madison Park, the ethos of that restaurant is to just blow the doors off everything. Think outside the box. Be creative. Push, push, push to make an amazing legend for someone. We would do things that other restaurants wouldn't even think about.
Will Guidara would constantly talk about “what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?” That got injected into my life. Why create restrictions and boundaries for yourself, whether it's putting a dish on the menu, pouring a certain wine by the glass, or saving someone's life? Why would you limit yourself? We all can do amazing things if we want. We just have to be willing to step outside of our comfort zone.
How did you decide to donate to a stranger versus someone you knew already?
My uncle had donated a kidney to his brother 32 years ago, and his brother is doing great. I never encountered needing to give it to somebody that I knew.
Sometimes it's right place, right time. I moved to Carroll Gardens in 2014. I went to Lucali a couple times. I'd walk by it every day when I walked to the train. For whatever reason, the algorithm that day decided to show me his story.
I don't do it for recognition. I truly believe in that idea of, if you do a good act and then you tell everybody about it, it's not a good act. It’s self-serving.
Part of the reason why I've taken interviews is because people need kidneys. It's one of the easiest things you can do to save someone's life. You don't need two kidneys. The government helps take care of you during the process. The recovery is really fast. My hairdresser is going to donate a kidney because she was so inspired.
What was the process like, including telling your loved ones?
I asked my fiancé if it was crazy that I wanted to do this. She said, “no, you're going to do whatever you want to do anyway, and you have my blessing.” The rest is history.
We were a 98% match, which is basically impossible, so it was pretty special. It was a pipe dream. The team at New York-Presbyterian was incredible. They took great care of me.
Today, what’s your relationship like with Theo, who received your kidney?
We’re very close. We're planning on getting matching tattoos. I've grown to love him deeply.
I really believe in giving without strings. I think that for him, he feels in a way that there is a debt that can never be repaid. I will never need anything from him to make it feel repaid. His friendship has made everything worth it. He's such an amazing person.
How about with Lucali and Mark Iacono?
He's a kind dude. That's the only way I know how to say it. He's not an egomaniac like some chefs can be. He's just a kind, loyal guy, which I think you see a lot in that neighborhood in general.
What is something everyone can do to be kinder?
The magic words: please and thank you. And taking a moment to engage with strangers, to hear their story, how inspiring that can be in itself.
Related Read: Lucali's Mark Iacono Shares His New York Favorites
Hero image: Bojan Hohnjec / Rusty Rastello
